The 14 Best Songs About Not Getting Laid

Thought Catalog

1. “Hey Ladies” by the Beastie Boys

Hey ladies in the place I’m callin’ out to ya,
There never was a city kid truer and bluer,
There’s more to me than you’ll ever know,
And I’ve got more hits than Sadaharu Oh

Although this song off of Paul’s Boutique is ostensibly all about the Beastie’s sexual exploits, their self-deprecating wit and sardonic style reveal it to be little more than good-natured bluster. There’s something about the way these three effortlessly combine on verses, finishing each other’s lines and rapping in tandem, that gives you the distinct idea that they spent a lot more time with each other than with any ladies. The result is that instead of feeling like you’re listening to douchey guys share their conquests, you feel like you’re hearing three high school freshmen tell tall tales and drop innocuous in-jokes. “Hey Ladies” is endearing and fun, and…

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